How to Fear
by drinktea
Summary: Lessons on running from yourself. Tenzin & Korra, gen.


**A/n: **Hi, and thanks for checking out my oneshot (especially since it's not of the shippy variety)! This is set during episode 4, The Voice in the Night, and does pull quite a lot of dialogue from the episode. As a result, this reads a lot better if you've seen the episode itself. Korra and Tenzin made me super mushy as I watched, so this was born. Here's to hoping that they make you super mushy, too. Please enjoy, and reviews are much appreciated!

* * *

_"Admitting your fears is the first and most difficult step in overcoming them."_

* * *

In the dead of the night, Tenzin bolted up in bed to the sound of a scream. Who was it?

He cast his gaze over his surroundings. Pema, beside him, sleeping heavily and comfortably despite the seven months worth of baby growing within her. Across the hall, sleeping with her light on was Ikki, murmuring but not loud enough to have screamed. Meelo would have run in by now and thrown himself between both of his parents, chattering about the day ahead or crying about what he could only assume were nightmares. Jinora was a sound sleeper - so sound that she snored, not that she would admit or believe it. Tenzin rubbed an eye. The window was thrown open to reveal the bright gibbous moon, the chill of the bay wafting in. He'd best close it.

He'd just padded over to the window when he heard it - "It's- it's alright, Naga. I just had a... bad dream."

Against his better judgment, he looked out the window in the direction of Korra's room. Sure enough, her window was open, too. She sat hunched on her bed, Naga's large head stop her lap, and her hands moved absently over her companion's coat.

After a moment of quiet observation, he turned away from the window. He closed only one of the shutters... just in case.

* * *

_This was bad. No. No, at the most it was... bothersome. That was a good, safe word._

_How was it that Amon could be everywhere? The streets weren't safe, the airwaves weren't safe, not even her dreams were safe. Would he chase her forever? Was she doomed to sleepless nights?_

* * *

Slate grey eyes watched Tarrlok cross the room over to Korra. Tenzin had never liked the man, and his attitude toward the other councilman was growing colder and more suspicious by the minute. It was something in the reptilian flicker of Tarrlok's eyes, his slick good looks, his long, feminine fingers. There was a slight but distinct whiff of something rotten just beneath the surface of that practised smile. Tarrlok's success the other day at City Hall had left Tenzin bitter, and maybe that was why he'd urged the other man to drop the niceties and come out with whatever he wanted to say. But one look at the dwindling space between Korra and Tarrlok's elbows told him that it was probably more than just plain dislike.

"Patience, Tenzin," Tarrlok responded coolly, "I'm getting to that."

Tenzin bristled. He was the master of patience. What he wasn't the master of was Korra, and he was worried at what game Tarrlok was trying to play with his pupil. She was a smart girl and extremely talented, but strangely naive and trusting.

Tarrlok dropped the news of the task force. He felt his eyes tighten. "What?"

Tarrlok ignored Tenzin's interjection and faced Korra, leaning toward her, as if in on a secret. "I need someone who will help me attack Amon directly. Someone who is fearless in the face of danger. And that someone is you!" he rallied.

If he weren't watching her so closely he would've missed the flash of fright across her blue eyes. "Join your task force?" she repeated, something hollow in her voice.

His intuition flickered. Korra was hiding more than he'd thought.

"I can't," she said, hiding her expression behind her cup of tea.

Tarrlok persisted, but Korra deflected with what sounded, even to his ears, like an excuse about airbending training.

"You would get on-the-job experience while performing your Avatar duties for the city," Tarrlok pitched, speaking with his hands.

Korra's glance darted off to the corner of the room.

Tenzin took this chance to kick the councilman out. "Korra gave you her answer. It's time for you to go."

She looked up and into his eyes for the briefest of moments. In her expression he caught the flavour of gratitude. For the benefit of her pride, he pretended not to see.

* * *

_If she lost her abilities to bend the four elements, what would that mean for the world? The world would be Avatar-less, at least until she was reincarnated. Her physical connection to the world would be lost. Forget her spiritual connection. She was about as spiritual as a go-go dancer._

_But something niggled at her, guilted her: it wasn't the world she was worried about, was it?_

* * *

It was enough that the house was becoming cluttered with bath soaps, that the air constantly smelled of lilies, that the children were gorging themselves on little packs of candy, but a _satomobile_? Was Tarrlok so desperate for press and power that he would stoop to this level of brown nosing?

Tenzin walked past the red clump of metal toward the courtyard, where Korra was practising one of the forms he'd shown her a few days ago. Though the motions were all correct, there was a distracted air about her. He felt that she tottered on the edge of getting it absolutely wrong: one misplaced step, one spasm of a muscle and she would crash to the ground.

He opened with some comments that were unimportant. She replied, clipping her words.

"Why don't you take a break," he said, gently authoritative. He sat on the steps and indicated that she should join him.

She walked over, seeming very aware of every movement she made. She was guarded, choosing to sit an unnatural distance away from him.

"I'm glad you turned down Tarrlok," he told her. "But I just wanted to make sure your decision was for the right reason."

She didn't know just how much of her expression gave her away. Her eyebrows slanted upward. Worried. She looked worried. Worried that he would expose her secret. She gave him the same excuse of airbending training. He hated to think that she could use her training as a way to block this out.

He took a chance. "You know, it's okay to be scared. The whole city is frightened by what's going on."

Nothing.

He tried again. "The important thing is to talk about our fears. Because if we don't, they can throw us out of balance."

She didn't seem to even breathe as he spoke. She darted a glance at him from the corner of her eye, then turned her head away. It was the tiniest of movements, but he understood. She wasn't ready.

He got back up on his feet. "I'm always here for you if you want to talk."

* * *

_Airbending wasn't coming any easier to her. It was the freest of all the elements, the least grounded. Even with her legs crossed and her eyes closed, she felt no closer to that fated _click_, when everything would align._

_Maybe it was because in the quiet and the dark, the sounds of her own breaths so loud, it was never clearer to her that she was on the flat, solid ground. And that lurking somewhere on the very same earth was a man behind a mask, wishing for her very end._

* * *

After plucking Meelo up and away from the expensive marble fountains he had thought were urinals - Tenzin would wipe this memory from his mind during meditation tomorrow - he turned to see Tarrlok guiding Korra through the crowd. They were rubbing elbows with every possible big-wig. Lin Bei Fong had just snapped something nasty to his pupil, if the expressions on the faces in the circle were any indication. The brothers she'd made friends with looked decidedly awkward, and Hiroshi Sato had put a hand to his mouth. Korra's back was to him, but he saw the slight fall of her shoulders.

Tarrlok put a hand to the small of Korra's back and whisked her away. Tenzin waylaid one of the brothers - Bolin, was it? "Excuse me," he addressed the boy.

"Hey, Master Tenzin, how's it going?" Bolin asked genially.

"Well enough," Tenzin answered, tilting his head to the right. "Bolin, is it?"

"That's right, sir," Bolin smiled back. He offered a handshake in a student council sort of way, which Tenzin accepted.

"Bolin, I'd like to ask you a question," Tenzin said, levelling a serious look at the boy, hinting at the nature of the question.

Bolin's smile fell a bit. "Is it about Korra?"

Tenzin appraised the boy with fresh eyes. He wasn't entirely happy-go-lucky, then. "That is correct," he nodded, then paused for the proper effect. "Have you and Korra discussed the Equalist rally at all?"

Bolin put a hand to the nape of his neck and gave a nervy grin. "Not really, no. I just thanked her for saving me a few days ago, is all."

Tenzin's eyelids fluttered shut. She wasn't talking to anyone, then. Unbeknowst to her, she hadn't stopped screaming in her sleep, either. It had gotten to the point of Ikki laying extra blankets over her as she slept, and Pema sneakily placing a glass of warm milk at her bedside every night.

A big fuss broke out in the high-ceilinged hall suddenly, the chatter of reporters and the flash of cameras. Tenzin watched Tarrlok descend the steps and not-so-subtly shove Korra down the stairs as well. It bore an uneasy resemblance to feeding someone to the shark-eels.

"Avatar Korra, you witnessed Amon take away people's bending firsthand. How serious a threat does he pose to the innocent citizens of Republic City?" asked one of the many reporters.

Like a newborn gazelle, Korra moved her limbs creakily. She cleared her throat. "I think... he presents a real problem," she tried to say loudly.

"Then why have you refused to join Tarrlok's task force? As the Avatar, shouldn't you be going after Amon?" another reporter snapped.

Tenzin did not see this ending well.

The reporters prodded at her, talking fast and taking every little detail down in their notepads. They fired off question after question.

"Are you afraid of Amon?" asked one voice among many. It was the question he'd been wanting to ask her, been waiting for her to answer on her own time.

It was this voice Korra heard as she finally broke, eyes shut tight in frustration. "I'm not _afraid_ of anybody!" she shouted, extra scorn pumped into the word _afraid_. She stepped forward, squaring her shoulders. "If the city needs me, then I'll join Tarrlok's task force and help fight Amon."

"There's your headline, folks!" crowed Tarrlok immediately, sounding victorious.

Tenzin's gaze fell. This wasn't the answer. She'd fallen into this, hook, line and sinker.

And if the look on her face meant anything, she knew it, too.

* * *

_The raid showed that she was fine. She always operated best with a plan of attack in the forefront of her mind, and the results spoke for themselves, didn't they? She only had to look at the feature in the daily newspaper for proof. She would have more tangible proof tonight, when she faced Amon head-on.  
_

_(It was her own little secret though, that she didn't think she looked like herself in those photos.)_

* * *

His fist closed around his glider over and over again as he watched Avatar Aang Memorial Island. One by one, lights began to wink out around him and Tarrlok. They hadn't moved from the very spot Korra had stood at nearly an hour ago. The police airships hovered above the clouds, connected via radiowaves.

"Men, take five," Tarrlok relayed to the forces.

Tenzin felt his hackles rise instantly. "What are you doing? Korra hasn't returned," he told the other man.

"The forces haven't seen anything but Korra sitting at your father's feet for the last hour," Tarrlok replied, annoyingly blase. "If anything happens, they'll jump on it. Besides, she's the Avatar. She can handle herself for a few minutes."

Tenzin resisted the urge to grind his heel into the other man's foot. He flicked open his glider and left for the Island without a word.

This was as far as he'd let this go. He wouldn't have her injured over this. It was _because_ she was the Avatar that she was so vulnerable to the Equalists, to the pressures of the city, to her own doubts and fears.

He circled the island quickly, a critical eye scanning the monument below. Not a single soul was to be seen. Panic began to press in against his lungs, and no amount of deep breathing would will it away. He touched down at the entrance to the temple inside. The fire of a lamp shone from within, throwing light over a fallen figure, unmistakable to his eye. The worst scenarios flitted through his mind.

"Korra!" he called, running to her. "Korra," he repeated, kneeling, plucking her torso up easily. "Are you alright? Was Amon here?" he asked her urgently.

She sat up on her own. She did not meet his gaze, but her voice betrayed more than her eyes could have told him in the partial darkness. "Yeah," she answered, voice equal parts shameful and reflective. "He... ambushed me."

He bit the bullet. "Did he- did he take your bending away?"

Her fingers were gnarled as she conjured a small flame atop her palm. "No... I'm okay."

"Thank goodness," he breathed.

She inhaled sharply. With that, the floodgates opened. She let out a sob, then threw herself to his chest, her teartrails fast soaking the fabric of his robe. His hands landed on her back without a thought.

"I was so terrified!" she confessed, rubbing the point of her nose into his shirt. Her grip on him tightened as she sobbed, "I felt so helpless."

He moved his palms soothingly over her shoulders. "It's alright," he promised. Then he added, for both their sakes, "The nightmare is over."

"You-" she started, then pulled away, sobs jerking through her torso, "You were right. I've been scared this whole time." She sounded so young.

Silent, he watched the firelight dance over the plains of her face. Her mouth was turned down at the corners and her nose ran and her eyes were still streaming. She wiped her tears away to little effect. "I've never felt like this before, and- and I don't know what to do," she told him. She sounded so hopelessly lost, so fragile, and it was all he could do to keep his eyes on hers. After all this time, she was finally seeing. Now, he inclined his head, acknowledging her feat.

She collapsed back against his chest and continued to cry.

He put comforting arms around her again. He couldn't navigate the waters for her, no. But he could certainly act as her compass. She was pupil, Avatar, and yes, daughter, all in one. It was his duty, his honour and his desire to do all he could. Right now, he would hold her, because that was what she needed. He would always do - and be - what she needed.

* * *

_Thank you, Tenzin._


End file.
